Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

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5chn3ll
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Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by 5chn3ll » Wed Sep 26, 2018 11:38 am

After swapping out my sport cats for stock cats, resetting the ECU, and waiting for a couple of days for the emissions testing cycles to complete, I headed out to get the car smogged Monday. What an ABSOLUTE cluster.

Shop 1: Sorry, our equipment for old-ass cars like your 996 is not working.
Shop 2: Sorry, we don't have equipment for old-ass cars like your 996.
Shop 3: I can't yet talk about shop #3 without spiking my blood pressure.
Shop 4: Sorry, we don't have equipment for old-ass cars like your 996, but go see shop 5!

Shop 5 hooked me up finally. By "hooked me up," I mean he was the only one out of 5 establishments I tried that the necessary, functional equipment to get my car registered. This pisses me off immensely...if you want to pass legislation to require this shit, that's fine - but the entire system is a train wreck. I spent a good chunk of a day trying to find a WORKING test facility so I could pay them $50.

It's just getting worse, too - vehicles built before 2000 require a different set of emissions testing equipment than newer cars. State-designated STAR smog shops are supposed to have the equipment to test pre-2000 vehicles, but since the number of older cars continues to decline, shops are not bothering to repair the gear to smog older vehicles.

I'm all for cleaner air; if emissions testing is a necessary part of clean air, fine. However, if you're going to FORCE me to do something, at least make a half-assed effort to ensure it's reasonably available.

Dammit, I love California, but I just don't see living here forever.

Incidentally, the car passed with flying colors...that's the real pisser. All I needed was someone who knew what they were doing and some working equipment, and I was done in 10 minutes.

Understeer: You will hit the wall with the front end.
Oversteer: You will hit the wall with the rear end.
Horsepower: How hard you will hit the wall.
Torque: How far you will move the wall.

Gone hunting with Alec Baldwin and Dick Cheney. Back soon.

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FRUNKenstein
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by FRUNKenstein » Wed Sep 26, 2018 12:40 pm

Nebraska's taking applications. I'm sure Billy can get you on.
www.kansascityautomuseum.com
Current:
2002 996TT X50, Guards Red
1987 928S4, Guards Red
1987 951, Guards Red
1973 914 2.0 Bahia Red

2006 955S, Lapis Blue
Other toys:
1988 BMW 325i Cabriolet, Alpin Weiss
1987 Bertone X1/9, Verde Chiaro
Gone but not forgotten: 1975 914 2.0, Laguna Blue; 1999 996 C4 Aerokit Black; 1990 964 C2 Guards Red; 2006 955S Arctic Silver

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FRUNKenstein
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by FRUNKenstein » Wed Sep 26, 2018 12:41 pm

Oh, and when I retire to my exquisitely luxurious condo in Chula Vista (you know, someday when I can actually afford to spend a night in it), the car that will reside in the garage will be wearing KS plates (or MO dealer tags).
www.kansascityautomuseum.com
Current:
2002 996TT X50, Guards Red
1987 928S4, Guards Red
1987 951, Guards Red
1973 914 2.0 Bahia Red

2006 955S, Lapis Blue
Other toys:
1988 BMW 325i Cabriolet, Alpin Weiss
1987 Bertone X1/9, Verde Chiaro
Gone but not forgotten: 1975 914 2.0, Laguna Blue; 1999 996 C4 Aerokit Black; 1990 964 C2 Guards Red; 2006 955S Arctic Silver

Kalashnikov
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by Kalashnikov » Wed Sep 26, 2018 12:47 pm

That's liberal bull shit cluster fuck for you. Keep voting D, and you will be taking D up yours. You got hordes of homeless zombies on the street, but hey... We need that smog testing done and more stringent laws passed.

I need to petition Trump to also build the wall in AZ's west border to keep the fleeing 🧟‍♂️ out. I am seeing way too many CA plates around town with mindless libs supping their soy tea.

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TheDeckMan
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by TheDeckMan » Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:11 pm

That blows! At least her in Cali of the east we have a rolling 15yr rule. Emission exempt after 15yrs due to how few cars last that long with the rust issues, let alone maintaining old emissions testing equipment.
996TT - Widowmaker Project -RWD, UMW Tune, H&R RSS, Phenix Engineering Control Arms/LCA's, GT3 6 Pistons, SpeedTech 3" X-Pipe, Ported Headers, 997 GT3 Shifter, GT3 Buckets, GT2 Clutch/PP, GT2RS IC's, RSS Roll Bar, GT3 Brake Ducts, Joe Toth Aero/Ducts, Champion Thrust Arms
997TT - LSD, Chrono , UMW Tune, DSC, Phenix Engineering Toe Links & LCA Bushings, Tubi Race, 3" eRams, 964RS Engine Mounts
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DTMiller
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by DTMiller » Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:15 pm

He's all for cleaner air for the 48 hours a year his emissions control system works as designed.
2002 Guards Red Targa, Fister exhaust, H&R Sport Springs, semisolid motor mounts
1997 MX-5 track car
Friday at the Track, Chin Trackdays, SCCA WDCR Novice Classroom Instructor, SCDA, Audi Club Potomac, TrackDaze HPDE Instructor
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Willing to risk life for track time

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5chn3ll
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by 5chn3ll » Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:42 pm

Heh. I see what you did there. Incidentally, my car with sport cats would still pass emissions testing, but not a visual inspection.

I have tried running catless, but the stink is unbearable...

Understeer: You will hit the wall with the front end.
Oversteer: You will hit the wall with the rear end.
Horsepower: How hard you will hit the wall.
Torque: How far you will move the wall.

Gone hunting with Alec Baldwin and Dick Cheney. Back soon.

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gnat
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by gnat » Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:46 pm

5chn3ll wrote: Wed Sep 26, 2018 11:38 am I'm all for cleaner air; if emissions testing is a necessary part of clean air, fine. However, if you're going to FORCE me to do something, at least make a half-assed effort to ensure it's reasonably available.
You are making the incorrect assumption that they are interested in you keeping that enemy to the environment. They want you to be frustrated so that you'll just scrap the thing (because they've made everyone else not want to deal with it too) and buy a nice new Prius or Tesla.

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5chn3ll
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by 5chn3ll » Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:52 pm

It's really shitty that they (California Air Resources Board) scrapped the rolling 30-year exemption that was supposed to happen, but yeah, their goal is to get people to buy new cars.

Makes sense - driving a 20-year-old 911 a couple times a week is DEFINITELY worse for the planet than going out and buying 4,000 pounds of recently-smelted metals, strip-mined rare-earth elements, cadmium and other toxins, and however many barrels of oil it takes to make all of the plastics in a new Toyota. We're gonna ride this hemp-powered planet-saving rocket all the way down until all that's left is a smoldering, gluten-free crater.

Understeer: You will hit the wall with the front end.
Oversteer: You will hit the wall with the rear end.
Horsepower: How hard you will hit the wall.
Torque: How far you will move the wall.

Gone hunting with Alec Baldwin and Dick Cheney. Back soon.

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gnat
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Re: Car Smogging Clusterf*ck...

Post by gnat » Wed Sep 26, 2018 2:17 pm

I own a TDI motor so please don't get me started on the idiocy of CARB. I will start foaming at the mouth...

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